Report Card

I just survived a little ordeal over the last few hours -- a committee threatened to collapse from outstanding problems and a lack of communications. Time is running out for Sports Ball, and it feels like one of the last few episode of 24.

I guess things will work out in the end; like a mythical horde army, once the artillery pieces and berseker ranks are in place, strategy takes to the bench. With the war-horn,a furious thunder of feet, fists and metal will be unleashed. H'ok... maybe not in such magnificent drama... though I could probably write an entry on this...

But the devil IS in the details... Just like how you'd buy a piece of self-assembly from IKEA and expect it to come with all the instructions, nuts, bolts and little blessings, Sports Ball is being being assembled, but slowly. Progress has been sluggish in the areas of liaison cos of the huge levels we need to liaise through. Programs can get real tricky, with so much details to be looked into. Do you check all the nuts, bolts and accessories when you buy that self-assembly? Well, we don't wanna end up a piece short now, do we? Oh boy...

My new teacher has issued me her first report card. I guess I've been warned before about this, and I've seen it coming... My new teacher's comment: JK has done well so far, but needs to work on his time management. Can be a bit of a brat when facing unfavrouable situations. Keep up the hard work!

I guess it's true, to my disappointment and regret, that I can have such brat tendencies when situations don't seem to work out. It seems that when things start to close in, and people stop being nice about things that need to be done, when I find that I can't go according to my plans... I just feel frustrated. Time to bend to these circumstances again. I guess in retro-bitch-spect, everything could be avoided, because I could / should have said 'no' or did something along the way. But such comments are not constructive, not at all, when your mind blinded by the thumb of a rising heartbeat. It's not as if I've stopped trying or can't be bothered. Don't take it out on me, please.

Had to take a good half-hour of silence and meditation to clear my head yesterday. Frankly, while a resolution this occasional brat-tendency seems attractive, I find that such an end is in itself pointless -- situations are always dynamic, who could tell what's the next thing that sets me off? My only weapon against is peace, my only ally is mindfulness; on this sea you are my lighthouse. Because of you, you, you and you.... I am reminded of why I should remain in control and maintain my focus.

I owe much to this teacher, and also to her other (unwilling) students like you. Keep the lessons coming. We're ready.


JKLM