I Already Love Her

She turned my chaos into light
When my days all feel like nights
Gave me another reason to fight
To seek, to find, to love this life


Oh how it stirred my weary soul
Sparked a desire to have and hold
She was the flame against my night
"But it cannot happen," I was told

Oh the bitterness I felt
The anguish my reality dealt
That I must bend like the others
And not follow what I felt

But these moments are wise
For possession has a great price
To be paid by captor and captive both
For love to be bound in its device

What is free must remain so
Lest we forbid love to grow
We cannot keep what we cannot hold
Much less fit pure love into a mould

After much deliberation,
I reconsidered the situation
I guess I already loved her
Without the meaningless posession

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I've tried many times before to "love" so many people, only to end up temporarily elated by the illusions I chose to see and believe. But this peace is fragile, and indeed none of my previous "loves" lasted very long. Not to say that I wasn't serious about them, but I certainly didn't know what was truly wrong.

I'm only beginning to see that many of the things I've done in the past have stemmed from my obsessive pursuit of purpose and romance. They have undoubtedly shaped me and convinced me of some approaches in life, where some of my greatest mistakes involved trying to possess what was once free, and to force love to conform to my romantic ideals.

Ah such mistakes do not reveal themselves easily or quickly, because we would surely have been blind in our pursuits; our mental gaze tunneled by our personal histories and past baggages. A continuous and thorough evaluation of one's life would be necessary to begin the journey of self-discovery -- for it is only after finding yourself, that you can truly find, and love, someone else.

Save Your Dreams For Another Day

Catcher, oh dear catcher
Can you hear me?
Do you know my heart?
For you hold my dreams

Do you save them
In those precious gems
That wink at me
In the night wind

I see in your eye
The promise of truth
A reason for my sigh
A hope for the missing

Catcher, oh dear catcher
How dear you are to me
I wish for your magic
To keep my heart

You'd guard my secrets
You'd stop the tears
You'd help me learn to save
My dreams for another day

Black Wings In The Night

You gave me a chance
To know how it feels
To fly upon wings
A freedom so real


I could have been Hermes
Through these night moments
When your precious gifts
Sailed me on streetlamp oceans


These black wings
Though are old
Their strong sweeps
Lend a power so real


Oh if only I could
Keep this up
But I've much to learn
Of this new art


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Thank you for the rollerblades :)