Promise

All I wanted was love
More than what I was
Rationed to receive

I tried listening and looking
Everywhere that seemed likely
It felt as if I was deceived

And so I promised to love myself
So I would never fall short
And always ready to receive

Alas I still felt lonely
Though laughed and learned
How to survive and deceive

I promised I would start again
And make it on my own
And one day people would see

And that day did come soon
Often they would see and smile
As long as it was what they wanted to believe

Mother's Tears

Have you ever
Thought you were clever
Thought you were smart
That your decision was art

Have you ever
Held back your anger
Held in your breath
Still thinking you were the best

Have you ever
Wanted to live forever
But planned and made
Your own funeral instead

Well I certainly had
When things got mad
And the gaps and wounds
Stretched further than words

I had not, surely
Felt more unworthy
When my mother's tears told
Me how I ruined her world